ELI5: Explain Like I'm 5

Cycle of abuse

The cycle of abuse is like a big merry-go-round that some people get stuck on. Just like riding on a merry-go-round, it can be fun at first, but it can also be scary or make you feel sick after a while.

In the cycle of abuse, there are four parts that keep rotating around and around. These parts are: tension building, explosion, honeymoon, and calm.

The first part is called tension building. This is when things start to get tense and uncomfortable. It's like when you're waiting for a test to start, and your tummy feels funny, or when your parents are angry with each other, and you don't know what's going to happen next. In the cycle of abuse, tension building could look like the person who is being abusive getting really angry over small things, or starting arguments for no reason.

The second part is called the explosion. This is when things get very bad very quickly. It's like when a volcano erupts, or when a balloon pops. In the cycle of abuse, the explosion could be the person who is being abusive hitting, yelling, or even screaming at the person they are hurting.

The third part is the honeymoon. This is when the person who was being abusive is suddenly very nice and loving. They might apologize a lot, give lots of gifts or make promises to change. It's like when you've been in a fight with your best friend, and they bring you your favorite snack the next day or invite you to play with them. In the cycle of abuse, the honeymoon might seem like everything is okay now and that the abuser is better or has changed.

The fourth part is the calm. This is when things seem peaceful and normal again. It's like when you're sitting on the couch with your favorite blanket, or when the sun comes out after a storm. In the cycle of abuse, the calm might make the person being hurt think that everything is okay now and that the abuse won't happen again.

But the thing is, the cycle of abuse keeps going around and around. Even though the calm might last for a little while, the tension-building will start again, and it will be only a matter of time until there is another explosion.

That's why it's essential for people who are in the cycle of abuse to get help and support to break the cycle and get off the merry-go-round. It might be hard to do, but it's possible, and there are people who can help.